Pat Paulsen

No one who saw the Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour, aired from 1967 - 1969, will ever forget the impassioned editorials from firebrand orator, Pat Paulsen.

Well, maybe Pat wasn't a firebrand and his editorials were always delivered in his trademarked deadpan monotone.

But who can forget his "defense" of the censorship?

The time has come to quit [bleep]-ing around and talk about censorship.

We have had our share of censorship problems, but we are not against censorship because we realize there is always the danger of something being said.

Censors have the right to censor what you hear. The Bill of Rights says nothing about Freedom of Hearing.

Therefore, censorship does not interfere with the constitutional right of every American to sit alone in the dark, in the nude, and cuss.

But Pat really hit the national consciousness when he ran for President. Pat, acting on the suggestion of Tom and Dick, thought why not. He couldn't dance, he said, and it had a good pension plan.

As his own biography states, Pat's campaign style was based on outright lies, double talk, and unfounded attacks on his challengers. So who would have thought Pat would be the innovator of the modern campaign tactics we so enjoy today?

Perhaps the greatest proof that Pat was destined to lead our country were his incredible connections to Abraham Lincoln. Of course many say this cannot just be coincidence. To see just a hint of how America missed its chance, click here.

Pat had one of the most unexpected guest roles on a prime time TV show when he played secret agent Bosley Cranston on "Wild Wild West" ("The Night of the Camera"). Naturally Bosley appeared to be hopeless nincompoop. When he first comes to help Jim he accidentally kills the suspect by tipping a piano case on him. But at the end he was the one who defeated the villains - and gets the girls. The only drawback to this episode is Ross Martin "Artemis Gordon", was temporarily absent from the series for health reasons. He was replaced by Charles Aidman playing Jim's temporay side kick, Jeremy Pike.

We knew Artemis Gordon, Artemis Gordon was a friend of ours, and Jeremy Pike, ladies and gentlemen, was no Artemis Gordon.

After three years, the Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour was canceled for being too controversial - an action laughable by today's standards. But Pat kept making personal appearances and even appeared in live stage plays. You could also find Pat in mainstream media. A big surprise to people who moved to Minneapolis in the late 1970's was when they tuned on the radio and heard - Pat Paulsen. It was a shock to hear that Pat was actually a perfectly articulate and absolutely normal person.

Yep, Pat had been acting all along.